The Fuck Parade happened last night, it went well.

A gentrifying estate agents had its windows cracked and Cereal Killers (Brick Lane) got trashed and they cried about it, still dumbfounded as to why they are being used as an example of gentrification, they are either willfully ignorant, using shit PR or just thick as fuck! Well cry me a river boys and crying is what a lot of middle-class colonisers of the East End have been doing. Take a look at this blog from a self-confessed posh ‘person’ (This is long-winded so bear with me):

http://www.poshbrokebored.com/2015/09/fuckparade-open-letter.html?m=1

I will select quotes and respond accordingly from that write-up and respond accordingly.

“I’m blogging about it anyway because I was there and what I witnessed firsthand infuriated me so much”…good, the Fuck Parade has worked then!

“It was nine in the evening, past closing time, so Henry and I put up the shutters on our shop – Regimental Vintage” – Why am I not surprised that your pissed off with an anti-gentrification demo then?

” Hundreds of people close to my age” – I guess J. and I. will be happy about that then!

“It was loud and annoying, even for Shoreditch on a Saturday night.” – Good, that is what the Fuck Parade is meant to be!

” it was obvious that they were rabble-rousers” – Well no shit professor!

“misplaced socialism” – Yeah, I do not think they are going to take lectures on socialism from a posh gentrifying business owner who clearly has no idea of what socialism is (Unless it is the “socialism” of the failed Firebox Cafe of course).

“so often appropriated by the bored who try to assuage their middle-class guilt” – You obviously have no idea of who attended it then. I know around at least 20 of the people there and mark my words, they are far from middle-class. Maybe in your world everyone is, fine, but maybe, just maybe some working-class people are not going to take shit from people like you?

“designed to stroke their own vanity” – As working-class people are we not allowed to feel a bit of vanity every now and again? Or do posh people like yourself just want us to stay in our cages?

“Police helicopters and riot police vans arrived at the scene. At this point, neither Henry, S, nor I knew what the devil was going on – only that some of the mob who were chanting “F*ck the police! F*ck the pigs!” were suddenly less cocky as they slipped sheepishly past the police” – Sheepishly? Like when the Territorial Support Group (TSG) Sergeant got decked by a participant? Like when the TSG left the scene because they were getting shit?

For someone so intimidated you had enough ‘courage’ to follow this evil mob of ruffians!

“We had absolutely no idea what all the kerfuffle was about until I, great internet sleuth that I am, discovered on Twitter that this rally was an anti-gentrification street party dubbed #FuckParade by “anarchist group” Class War. To quote the tripe from their Facebook event page: “Our communities are being ripped apart – by Russian oligarchs, Saudi Sheiks, Israeli scumbag property developers, Texan oil-money twats and our own home-grown Eton toffs. Local authorities are coining it in, in a short sighted race for cash by “regenerating” social housing.  We don’t want luxury flats that no one can afford, we want genuinely affordable housing. We don’t want pop-up gin bars or brioche buns – we want community…London is our home and worth defending against this onslaught of dog-eat-dog economics. Working class people are being forced out of our homes but we won’t go out without a fight.” More Tweets I dug up from supporters of Class War and those aligning themselves with Class War and #FuckParade revealed a deluge of hatred for ‘hipster scum’, capitalism, and ‘poshos’. My initial reactions were: Excuse me, what is this thinly veiled xenophobia?! How does race – Russian, Saudi, or Israeli – come into this?” – It does not come into it, other than the descriptive. It also mentions people of your ilk such as “home-grown Eton toffs”, is that xenophobic too? It is called reading between the lines you bell end!

“Also, you’re protesting against ‘hipster scum’ how…? By hosting a ‘street party’ with poi dancers, fire eaters, elaborate costumes, rock concerts?” – So street parties, fire eaters, elaborate costumes and rock concerts began, begin and end with hipsters? This is part of the point of the Fuck Parade, middle-class people like yourself appropriating things which have been enjoyed by everyone since time immemorial. These things were not invented by hipsters but with the greed that is inherent in posh people such as yourself you want it all except now we are taking it back! 

“Sorry to break this to you, but you sound like middle-class people b*tching about other middle-class people being middle-class.” – Again, you have absolutely no idea of the class composition of the Fuck Parade. In what way does any of it make someone ‘sound’ middle-class? You keep saying that but you never point out the points of what makes someone ‘sound’ middle-class. Mostly working-class people (As I say, I know at least 20-30 of them, their mates and their mates, all solidly working-class). I guess the lads and lasses from the council estates in and around London are middle-class too, I’m sure they’d be glad of the income at least.

Tom Orr on Twitter said: “The people at #fuckparade all look like hipsters to me. Are they targeting a different kind of hipster? Is it a hipster civil war?” – Your observational skills are lacking my friend!

“I can’t speak for the working class” – Right, you can not so do not even attempt to elaborate on issues affecting us. Anyway, you say “I can’t speak for the working class” and then go on to say this:

“but I can’t imagine they’d want you to fight for their behalf with displays of violence, obscenity, and such hypocrisy.” – That is speaking for us you no mark! You have no idea of who the people are on the Fuck Parade, you have no idea of working-class people or working-class life. The working-class people on the Fuck Parade obviously loved it and I can imagine many of the local working-class people who are against gentrification loved it too.

“I’m going to go out on a limb and judge (as you do so well) from your ability to afford expensive cameras, iPhones, costumes and makeup for your ‘street party’ that you lot are hardly impoverished.” – I have an expensive camera (They are not the sole preserve of well off people) and I am a construction worker on less than minimum wage so I guess I must be middle-class. I am going to go out on a limb here and say that perhaps given the media attention on this event then maybe those people with the cameras are professional photographers that are so common on events like this? Just a thought like! iPhones? Seriously? Clutching at straws there! You hardly have to be a millionaire to own an iPhone. I guess all working-class people must be walking around with carrier pigeons and if we are really lucky then we have the plush new hip mounted battery pack powered brick phones so common in the 1980s. Costumes? Make-up? Working-class people can not have those things? Seriously mate, you are really scraping the barrel here. Anyway can working-class people not have a decent wage? In your clueless posh world then you may have the caricatured image of working-class people in flat caps and donkey jackets with a cigarette hanging from our mouths; all to Hovis music but that does not stand up to reality. Clearly the message here is that if you are working-class you can not have a good time, have some nice things and dress well! Also working-class does not necessarily mean “impoverished”, I come from an industrial working-class family and I work in one of the few blue collar sectors left in this country (Construction) but there are only a few times when you could say I have been “impoverished”.

“Perhaps some of you have been to university.” – Some have, some have not, and what is your point? Are we all expected to be working down pit? Are working-class people incapable of receiving a good formal academic education? I guess my ex-heroin using, ex-homeless (Now council housed) mate going through outpatient rehab is middle-class then. I mean he must be, he has just got into university via an access course.

“I wonder how many of you ‘freelance'”- What is exclusively middle-class about freelancing? A freelance bricklayer, plumber, gardener, cleaner or labourer working exclusively for themselves are middle-class then I suppose. God forbid should some working-class people want to earn their own wages!

“while living at home with your parents” – People living at home with their parents is on the rise because of gentrification pushing rents up you tool!

“or if you are even born in the very city you’re trying to reclaim.” – So you have to be born and bred somewhere in order to have a voice in that place? Sounds a lot like the flipside of the coin you were complaining about before a la accusations of xenophobia. I guess the very working-class cockney P and S need a good spanking then.

Thomas Gardiner on Twitter said: “Irony of middle class, Oxford uni-type leftists, high on too much Bakunin, smashing shops because they’re “too middle class.” ” – Same as before, have no idea of class composition of the Fuck Parade, just going on assumption because they do not fit his idea of coal dust faced working-class pitmen and hod carriers. Also, I am an anarchist and I think Bakunin was a total prick (Something yourself and he have in common).

Hannah on Twitter said: “I wonder how many of those on the #fuckparade were actually born and bred in the area they’re so keen to reclaim?” – Quite a few but again, do they need to be? How many hipsters and yuppies that you are crying for were/are born and bred in the East End? Do some of the South Londoners that were there need a special East End writ next time? Maybe it escaped you but the East End has always been a transient area and an area of migration, do the migrants there not have any recourse to address grievances because they were not ‘born and bred’ there? Sounds a bit elitist and touching on xenophobia to me!

“You say you want to ‘reclaim’ London – how can you even claim London?” – The Fuck Parade is there to reclaim traditionally working-class areas of London (Shoreditch, Hackney, Whitechapel etc.) not the entirety of London (As desirable as that would be). It is not as if they are eager to ‘reclaim’ Chelsea and Kensington.

” It’s a free city.” – Yeah for people like you but not for the rest of us!

” A city that belongs to the people who call it home.” – I would agree but it does not belong to people who want to destroy it, sterilise it and push people out. This is the point of the Fuck Parade.

“People who have much more respect for its community than you seem to do” – Such as hipsters and yuppies creating gentrification which pushes the community out?

“judging by how you gleefully smash up shops for no real reason apart for the thrill of it. ” – No reason? You yourself have even pointed out the reasons. Seriously mate, shake your head.

In response to Lisa Mckenzie’s comment:

“Honey, let me break down economics and fair trade for you” – Nice bit of sexism there. Also I think you mean free trade, not ‘fair trade’.

“How is your vandalising the Cereal Killer café and making them the “poster boys of gentrification” doing the working class a favour? Eyewitnesses told me that some of your lot threw flaming torches, graffitied the windows, splashed paint all over the shop, and tried to force their way into the café. What are you trying to achieve apart from scaring the women, children, and staff in the cafe, who had to barricade themselves in from your lust for violence? Oh, it’s all justified because you think spending £5 on a bowl of cereal deserves an insurrection? Honey, let me break down economics and fair trade for you: if someone wants to spend £5 on a bowl of cereal or £10,000 on a table at The Box, that’s their prerogative. Nobody forced you to buy that cereal nor pay for that night out.” – OK, you are entirely missing the point here about how businesses such as that one are contributing massively to gentrification. Besides in such a poverty stricken area it is a massive insult and slap in the face to so brazenly charge £5 for the most basic of sustenance.

“If you have such a problem with capitalism, why don’t you demonstrate outside Westminster” – We do, hence the tens of thousands strong demos. But then again when you live in a nice cosey gentrified world you are bound to live life with your fingers in your ears and a blindfold over your eyes. This is probably what has bothered you so much, your comfort zone being disturbed.

“or even the Pret and Tesco just up the road” – As we have elsewhere but these places are so numerous can we get around them all? I do not think so! Besides no aspect of capitalism should be given a free reign, corporations or small businesses. After all, shit pits like Cereal Killers (A sick play on murder there) have ideas of expansion. All big businesses once started as small businesses too.

“Oh, right, because these large corporations/establishments can afford CCTV cameras that will capture your unlawfulness” – The entire area is covered in CCTV cameras. London is one of the most watched cities on Earth!

“security that will apprehend you” – Pret does not have security and could you honestly see one Tesco security guard going up against hundreds of protestors? Besides, a security guard has no legal right to touch you, he is a civilian and unless it is in self-defence then that is assault.

“and a prosecution team that will see you convicted for criminal damage” – The CPS? I guess everyone charged with criminal damage against large businesses has been convicted (See 26th March 2011 and Stokes Croft in Bristol). Your naivety is boundless!

” (and have your iPhones taken from you behind bars – no more Facebook or Twitter!)” – I guess those with bog standard old-school phones, Blackberries and Androids are allowed to keep theirs then.

“Unlike an independent business”  – Business is never fully independent, it is always part of capital. “who’ve worked hard to get to where they are now” – And are shitting on the local community as a result (In the case of Cereal Killers and other gentrifying places).

“which you’ve tried to cripple with one night of savagery.” – God forbid should you ever see a street fight if you think that is savagery, you would shrivel up!

Gray on Twitter said: “Hey, #fuckparade people? If you don’t like a shop, don’t spend money at that shop. That’s kind of how things work.” – See my response above, the same applies.

Cloudy Mao on Twitter: “So attacking a cereal cafe is fighting capitalism, that in the same way looting stores was fighting police brutality and racism?” – Yes, exactly!

“Some of you ‘protestors’ claim to partake in #FuckParade as a display of solidarity for the socialist cause,” – It is not a show of solidarity with socialism. Again, we are not going to take lectures about socialism from a capitalist.

” to fly the flag of the Left.” – Where was that even stated? A hell of a lot of the people on the Fuck Parade will not identify as ‘leftist’. If you had any idea of Class War’s ethos then you would know that your hypothesis is bullshit. I do not identify as “left”.

“All you’ve really done is a) give socialists and Lefties a bad name” – As if we had a good name anyway!

“b) give the Right Wing more ammunition with your poorly-thought out (but well-organised) orgy of boorish behaviour.” – As if they did not have any already.

“Do you even understand what socialism is?” – Yes, very much so, do you? It seems that it is you which does not a clue about what socialism is.

“Do you even remember why you’re so angry” – Yes, because of people like you.

“or did you just need an excuse to smash things” – No, places like Cereal Killers and the estate agents that got smashed give us enough excuse themselves to do so.

“and harass people?” – No, not everyone, just people like you!

Thomas Gardiner on Twitter (Again): “”I just smashed up a small, independent business! Because… Like, totes fuck capitalism or something? Up the revolution, yah?” #FuckParade” – Lol! You have no idea! We make no distinction between small and big business, capitalism is capitalism, period!

Hardy on Twitter: “Honestly, all #FuckParade will achieve is give Tory and UKIP shithouses all the ammunition they need.” – They do not need us to give them any, they will always find something regardless. Their very ideology (Conservatism) gives them automatic ammunition. P.S. UKIP are Tories (Shows the breadth of your political knowledge). 

“Fair enough, Class War – I agree with you that the property market in London is ridiculous.” – Yes, it is…because of people like you!

“I also think that the extortionate prices to buy a home in the capital is exploitative.” – Again, it is, because of people such as yourself!

” I sympathise with the middle and working-class who can’t afford to get on the property ladder until much later in life” – Or at all! Besides what makes you think we all have the desire to “get on the property ladder”? Some of us will never be able to do so and will spend all of our lives renting. Also, you can sympathise with the middle-class all you want because we do not, we have no sympathy for them at all. The middle-class are drowning? Then take away the life vests and give them to us, the working-class. Watch the fuckers drown! The squeezed middle? Not squeezing hard enough! As working-class people we do not need your patronising sympathy, people like you are part of the problem. What makes you think the Fuck Parade was/is about middle-class people anyway? Your point about sympathising with the middle-class is irrelevant.

“only to be burdened with ridiculous 50-year mortgages that they might be too busy killing themselves to pay off” – Circumstances you will never know you soft wet twat!

“I believe that the city, as a collective, have every right to express their dissatisfaction, to call for change and reform, for a fairer system that allows everyone a fighting chance to own their own homes, to not have to move out of the city the grew up in” – The gentrification you cheer lead and are part of is part of the cause.

” I even admit that my understanding of politics is basic at best” – Exactly, so we do not need lectures from you.

“and that my privilege protects me from the soul-crushing reality of having to choose between running myself ragged to keep up with a city I cannot afford or moving out of London.” – So we do not need you moralising to us, you have not got a clue about our lives and the lives of the participants of the Fuck Parade so please kindly shut the Hell up! You are part of the problem! Yes you as an individual (And your insidious class too), you owning/running a gentrifying shop, your apologism for gentrification and your (Sort of admittedly) misinformed opinions and ‘observations’ about those fighting back against it.

“BUT I DO NOT condone the actions that some of your followers glorify” – Well you would not would you? It is not within your interests to condone it!

“vandalising property” – As long as it is capitalist property then GOOD!

“harassing people” – Posh people like yourself? GOOD!

“and animals” – That would be bad but where is your evidence? You have plenty of photos of the police and the Fuck Parade but no photos of this alleged animal abuse? How convenient!

“and the hatred toward fellow Londoners” – No, wrong again. We love working-class London, which does not include you! Most of the people on the Fuck Parade are Londoners themselves. What is it? A display of self-hatred? The Londoners who hatred was directed against last night was middle and upper-class Londoners. Boo hoo!

“that some of your supporters have openly and publicly displayed (frankly, it reminds me of fascism)” – You have no idea what fascism is then, clearly!

“Oh, and your use of obscenity, but that’s just my problem.” – Yeah, that is your problem. “Obscenity” is a part of every day life.

Dominic Stevenson on Twitter: “Only fools would think #FuckParade were left wing. They’re the UKIP of spontaneous parades and throwing shit at shops.” – In what way does last night even resemble UKIP? Considering that they are a middle and upper-class conservative organisation dedicated to the preservation of capital.

Zlartty Bartfarst on Twitter: “@FuckParadeLDN @opVendetta2012 gangs of violent people smashing up shops by torchlight… Sorry, who are the fascists here? #fuckparade” – Who said this is about fascism? You have no idea of what fascism is. Fascism is a distinct political, social and economic ideology not an act in and of itself. Fascism uses violence yes but it is not violence personified. We sometimes use violence as well but so what? A dog has teeth and can bite but then again so does a lion, does this make a dog a lion? Anyway, violence predates fascism! Does that mean everyone who used violence before fascism even existed is now a fascist? Is someone defending themselves by using violence against a rapist, a fascist?

Mark Watson on Twitter: “#fuckparade the shape of things to come. Anger attacking the symptoms of the disease but, fundamentally, the wrong target” – Very much the right target(s)! What are the right targets then?

And from Henry:

• “I cannot in all good faith condone the actions of any so called fellow “socialist”. ” – We are not your “fellow” socialists because you are not a socialist, you are a capitalist.
• “this sentiment of mine has nothing to do with politics, belief, or of any form of philosophy.” – So do not even begin to lecture us on politics.
• “I am from London. I was born in the East End.” – As are many of the Fuck Parade participants.
• “While I feel a strong sense of patriotism,” – We don’t! We are not patriots so we have nothing in common there.
• ” I am not naive to what may be called a class struggle.”…”I have a small shop – Regimental Vintage” – Class struggle is a struggle against you then.
• ” All brandishing amongst other things, iPhones and DSLRs” – For fuck sake, you are seriously pulling the iPhone thing out as well? Give it a rest you clown! DSLRs…read my response above. If this is your line of argument then it is laughable.
• “someone’s pet dog running in terror from the mob who shrieked in delight as they kicked the defenceless animal.” – If that is really what happened then why do you not have footage or a photo of it? I would have done two things: 1) Stopped them from abusing a defenceless animal (If not then I would have smacked them one afterwards) and 2) Got evidence.
• “I have not had the privilege of a university education.” – Nor have many of the participants of the Fuck Parade.
• “I am the son of a Sargent Major in the British Army” – That really does not help your case!
• “It is of my (perhaps warped) opinion of London and Londoners that any form of aggressive behaviour on anyone’s behalf will go unnoticed.” – It is not on anyone’s behalf other than our own and obviously it has not gone unnoticed.
• “This city has not only survived, but in fact flourished, after Plagues, Great Fires, Blitzes, riots, and terrorist attacks.” – All of which could not break London but one thing which is breaking London more than any of that is gentrification.
• “Whatever the point might have been all I know is one thing -the people of this wonderful city will never be shocked or frightened into any form of submission by anyone’s vain attempt to frighten us with loud bangs and smashing glass.” – It was directed against a section of London not London in its entirety.
• ” This little attempt to scare us was as futile and as pointless as going trick or treating a few weeks before Halloween.” – It has obviously worked to some degree or else why are you responding like this? Why are people crying so relentlessly over it?
• “MY people” – Yeah, your people, capitalists.
• “I might not eat cereal in a trendy bar in Brick Lane but I am going to have a bowl of something there tomorrow” – And by doing so becoming further part of the problem.
• “God bless my beautiful hometown London and all those who believe in you…not rich property developers” – Those are your mates who you cater to!
• “Those who leave every morning knowing that in this city – with all her faults –  anyone can be whatever they want to be.” – Completely fucking deluded.
• ” it’ll be a cold day in Hell when we let a bunch of angry kids” – Does that include the adults there too?
• “who try (and will always fail) to destroy anything they don’t agree with.” – It seems like there has been some success in case you did not notice. I do not know what you think we are but it is not as if we walk around every day with bricks in our hands (Well, except the brick layers and labourers among us) smashing anything in sight. Your reaction to this is simply a caricature.
• “I might be talking total sh*t” – Yes, you really are.

” I have to be up in a few hours to open our shop and to resume business as usual” – Business as usual being aiding the gentrification of the East End. 

” because no amount of vandalism nor mindless thuggery can or will dampen the spirit of London’s East End” – You have no idea about the spirit of the East End, it is posh people like you who are killing that spirit. It has always been a working-class spirit, something you are not and never will be a part of.

“We’re here,” – That is the problem and we know it, we feel it!

“we have a  dream, and we intend to make it work come rain or shine” – It is working, look at the poverty in the East End.

Good day all!