Monthly Archives: September 2018

Heart to heart

Do you pray?… No, do you?… That’s not right. You should pray! … Who me? … Why don’t you pray? … That doesn’t matter. We’re talking about you. … Oh! We’re talking about me! That’s very exciting. … I bet you do pray. I bet you do and you’re just not saying so. … I can’t say so! I’m laughing too hard!

So I’m right, then? You do pray?… No, I don’t! I don’t! Don’t you tell anyone that I do! … Stop laughing! This is serious. You’re almost lying. … I can’t help it. I can’t help laughing. You’re too much fun. But let’s be serious, now, if you want to be serious. … I want to be serious! Do you pray or don’t you?… I sortof pray. … You can’t sortof pray. You either do or you don’t! … No, I sortof do. … Like sometimes you forget?… No…

No?… No, I never forget. … You never forget to pray? … That’s right. … So you never forget, you always remember to pray? You can laugh, go ahead. … Yes, you got me! I always remember to pray, but please! … Please what? What is it? … Please, don’t tell anyone. … Why not? … Oh, I don’t know. They won’t understand. They’ll think I’m silly. … You are silly. And you always tell everyone you don’t pray, but you do. And *I* knew it, hmm?… Yes, you knew it. You got me. … I win. … But you’re wrong, I don’t pray, it’s not like you think! I hate that stuff! … What do you mean, it’s not like I think? What is it? … It’s like, well, you and I, we are talking? … Yes. … And it makes sense, us talking. It’s not like *prayer*. … What do you mean? … I mean, we’re just talking, it’s normal. It’s not like talking to no one, talking to yourself, talking to some invisible spirit. … Haha, now you are wrong! I’ll be no one, and yourself, and an invisible spirit! … Stop it, stop it, now I’m being serious. …. That’s where you went wrong. … You wanted me to explain this, and now I want to too. … Ok, ok, I’m not an invisible spirit then now, ok? … Ok, so we’re talking, and it’s fine. It makes sense, to talk. … We talk a lot. … Well, you like to talk…. You too. …

Ok, so that’s what I mean, pretend you and I were together all the time. … I wish we were together all the time. … Me too, we should try it. … We do try it, we just can’t do it. … That’s right, we do try it. So pretend we could do it, we could be together all the time, because we had nothing else to do. … But you would get bored. … I probably would, you would too. … So pretend there’s two of me and two of you then, one that is the regular us, and one that is just doing nothing, just going along with the regular us. … So one me that follows you around, and one you that follows me around?… Exactly. It is easy to explain things to you, because we talk so much. … I wish we could talk more, but it takes time. … Me too, that’s what I’m talking about! Imagine we could talk all the time, because we were together all the time, and one of us didn’t have anything else to do, and we didn’t even need to take turns. … Ok. … Ok what?… Ok, I am imagining it. … You should imagine me hitting you with a pillow! … I won’t even! I’m too busy imagining talking to you…

Look, that is my explanation, and you knew already that it is. … You imagine hitting God with a pillow? … I haven’t yet, but I would if I wanted to, why not? He’d probably hit back, and, and, and, it would be like the most amazingly fun example of getting hit with a pillow that you could ever imagine! … Fine, fine, that’s what I get for teasing you! When I hit you with a pillow, it doesn’t even matter how I do it, it’s substandard, now! … Only a little, only just barely substandard. … Ok, ok. I get it. But look, I wanted to ask you something else, hey, wait, let’s whisper…

(whispering) Ok. … Now no one can hear us, come closer. … No one could hear us before! … Shhh! We’re whispering. … Oh, I see now, this is very serious. … Yes. I have to ask you another question, and it is very serious. … Ok, I am listening very seriously. … Ok. Ready? …. Yes. …. People say that when you pray, god talks back to you. Does he? … God doesn’t talk back, silly. That would be rude! … Shhh, whisper! You know what I mean. He says things back to you, when you say things to him, when you pray. … Oh, is that what people to say? Who do they say it to? … I don’t know who they say it to, but I heard it and so have you, so has everyone. … No, I never heard it. People always say god doesn’t answer when you pray, so they have to make up their own answers. … No, people say he says things back to you. He does, doesn’t he? … No, of course not! … No? … Yes, no. He’s way too busy to talk.

What? … I mean, he’s not too busy to listen. … But in your explanation, didn’t you say he said. … No, no, he doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t talk. He’s listening to everybody. If he talked it would probably be confusing, because he’s listening to everybody at once. And, like, doing stuff, I don’t know what, I guess. … Oh, no one told you what god is busy doing? … No, but I can imagine, you know. I haven’t thought about it too much. I’m busy too, so I just think about what I’m doing, but I think about it At god. There.

Where? … Not where there, just there. There. That’s it. … That’s it? … Yes, I think you understand what I mean. … I think I do too. God is your imaginary friend, and you just talk to him all the time? … No, you are my imaginary friend. God is god. … Fine! … But I talk to him all the time. I’m like, ‘Look, a cat, god! Cats are nice.’ And he’s like, ‘Yes they are, dear,’ or something like that. But I don’t hear him, I don’t pay any attention. … Because you are both so busy…. Yes, someone has to stay up late talking to you! … And sometimes you make breakfast in the morning, too. … Yes, and you eat it. … So you are saying he doesn’t answer. He doesn’t say, ‘Yes they are, dear.’ … Right, he doesn’t say anything. I was just making an example. That’s something he *might* say. …

Oh, I see. But is that praying? I would not say so. … You would not say so? … No, I do not think that is what people mean when they say praying, so I would not say so. … Ok. Have it your way. … But if you want to call that praying, we can. … If I want to call it, ok… Shhh, we talked enough. You always answer my questions. Goodnight. … Mmmm, goodnight.



I would have spaced this out and put each piece of dialog on its own line, to make it easier to read, but these two didn’t want to be that far away from each other.